A new year’s resolution propelled me to “do something I loved” … I found myself in more ways than one!!
Booked on a song writing course, with trepidation, tiny steps leading me, slowly my mind synapsed, enveloping me with a passion I had not felt in 20 years for music and my song writing, which had almost been forgotten.
A mother, wife and nurse but a passionate woman whom just breathes music I started writing and making my own music.
Working as a nurse in this pandemic, music and song writing has saved me. The world was going crazy, and I was trying to maintain my sanity. Working and worrying, worrying and working and trying to remain calm. Trying to occupy a scared mind, waking through the nights of what ifs, sick to my stomach. Worried for my patients, worried for my family and so worried for myself. While the rest of the country stayed home to protect the NHS, in to work I went, with my plastic coverings to protect against a deadly virus, against all of my self protective mechanisms. They all clapped and I just longed to hide away. Music transporting me away from the anxiety, stress, dread and kept me company with the frequent insomnia I have faced. A welcome distraction from the sadness of today. My counsellor and confidante, it has saved me and I have found a little piece of me, a new me.
My songs are the observations of a pessimistic mind trying with all her might to be optimistic. What I think, feel, but ultimately just me in my spare room, of my home near Loch Lomond, Bonny Scotland.
I suppose when you have no clue what you’re doing, there are no rules to follow.